Workplace Persona #4 - Just Jira Jimmy
You may know a Jimmy.
Jimmy loves process.
Jimmy has one solution for everything.
JImmy is in love with epics, tasks and subtasks!
Jimmy is a Jira master.
You know Just Jira Jimmy.
Meet JJJ.
Observations on JJJ’s
Observation 1. JJJ is a wonderful person. They are likable and you enjoy your one on ones. But you can finish his sentences because they always end with Jira. That is annoying.
Observation 2: JJJ is smart but somehow gave up on learning once they found this snake oil. They’ve become obsessed with functionality built in to the seventh wonder of the world for project tracking. Nothing else can compare with the tool only they have mastered.
Observation 3: JJJ maybe the only person in earth who knows the difference between an Epic and a Story. It’s so easy they say! That’s an epic! That’s a story! How can you not tell the difference you imbecile. My story is an epic fail.
Observation 4: JJJ’s only want to help on their terms. Their assistance is dependent on your obedience to the process. Is your roadmap in Jira? Are all your tasks in Jira? Did you create labels in Jira?!? For Christ sakes JJJ, “what does Jira do for me?!?!”
Observation 5: JJJs proclamation of the land of milk and honey where no spreadsheet lives is a farce. They say if you do all these things, I won’t have to fill out a spreadsheet again. But how many god damn fields to I have to update in this god forsaken tool I don’t know how to use?!? No I didn’t watch the how-to video ! I was too busy filling out spreadsheets, and yes I see the irony!!
Observation JJJs like to suggest you do work, instead of them doing work for you. I want work done, but I don’t want to do it. This is a problem, and I know the answer isn’t in Jira.
